post the other day on Julie DeNeen's blog that had me nodding my head over and over in agreement. In this post Julie lists "23 Terrible Social Media Habits You Might Not Realize You're Doing". I'm not going to sit here and repeat her list but it is well worth checking out so click on the link at the beginning of this paragraph to see how many you agree with and how many you're guilty of.
One point that she makes is that bad habits, unfortunately, spread as easily (if not more) than good habits. Like when one person puts half a dozen hashtags on their post so the next person not only copies them but feels compelled to top them. This is a self-perpetuating bad habit that has become a fad. Personally I get annoyed when I see more than one.
She asked her readers to go to Twitter, Google+ or Facebook and tell her what annoys them on social media using the (ONE!) hashtag #socialmediasmackdown. Please feel free to join in!
Here is my response:
@jdeneen4 I hate when people use internet anonymity as an excuse to be nasty/rude. #socialmediasmackdown
— Kat M (@kathym425) March 30, 2014
Over and over again, I am amazed at the things people say to each other on the internet. People call each other names, insult each other's intelligence and criticize each other's looks/parenting skills/ opinions. People hiding behind made-up names with pictures that are not their own say things to others that they would never dream of saying to their faces. Somehow, the fact that those who they are being cruel/rude to are "out there somewhere" makes it okay.
Unfortunately, the internet is the ideal venue for bullies of all ages. I have even caught myself starting to type things that shock me. It can be too easy to step over the line when you are secure in your own home talking to a screen, forgetting that it's a human being who will be reading it. I've taught myself to always re-read everything that I type before I click "enter". I ask myself, "is this something I would say to that person's face?" and, if the answer is no, I re-do it until it does sound like the real me. Have I ever ended up typing something that I did regret? Yes, because I am human and so very imperfect but at least I do make a supreme effort to be somebody whose face/name others are happy to see.
None of this means that I think the internet should be a rose garden where everybody agrees with everybody else and life is all sunshine and rainbows. It's perfectly okay to disagree with one another and to express that disagreement. This is how we learn and grow as people. If only more people stopped to breathe and re-read their words before posting their opinions…..
Thankfully, the majority of people are pretty decent and keep blogging and other social media activities a great experience. When I do run into those who don't, I just hit "unfollow".
Amen! It is horrifying some of the shaming and mean things people feel free to post. I love your approach of thinking before clicking. I try to ask myself too, 'Can this be misinterpreted?' We miss so many of the social/facial cues with social media, so I think it's worth being extra careful about what we post.ReplyDelete
That's true, misunderstandings can happen so easily when you can't see the person's face. This should make us MORE careful not less.Delete
I think the best thing to do is to ignore such people. It's a good idea to read everything twice before publishing it online!ReplyDelete
I do tend to "walk" away from those who are being rude. They don't deserve my attention. The other benefit of reading everything twice is that you get to catch your spelling mistakes :)Delete
Although, as an introvert with social anxiety, I am much more outspoken on the internet. But in a good way, I hope!
Thanks for the great post. Cyber bullying isn't done by just kids. Us adults can easily be drawn into it as well.
I'm very shy in real life too but find myself being far more bold when I'm online; more willing to interact with people who I don't know. Like you, if I'm going to be bolder, I'd rather make friends while doing it than enemies.Delete
Great post, and unfortunately the people who need this advice, will not recognize themselves... I am guilty of revising posts several times, and sometimes just deleting the post. I once wrote a post that about five minutes after I posted it I removed. I cannot change the world by shaming other people!ReplyDelete
You're so right about that; those who need posts like this most, unfortunately, are the ones who won't recognize themselves in it. I too have been known to start typing a comment on social media only to delete it before hitting "enter". I like to think that we're showing some maturity when we do that - goodness knows I could use a little more maturity sometimes ;)Delete
Last fall I retweeted a tweet about gun control; people who disagreed with my sentiment spent two months attacking me and insulting me on Twitter. I've never had to block so many people in my life. But I doubt they would have called me names if it had happened when we were face to face.ReplyDelete
They definitely wouldn't have been so mean to your face! Part of me wants to comment about hot-button topics like that and the other part wants to keep my opinions to myself just because of craziness like that. It's a fine line we walk sometimes.Delete
I have even seen this on Christian social media sites. It is so sad! There are lots of post I don't agree with but then I stop reading and if it is in my feeds I hid them. If I find it offensive I will charitably state my opinion.ReplyDelete
Great post! Thanks sharing!
Unfortunately, when religion or politics get thrown into the mix, we sometimes get to see people at their worst. If I feel that I can make a comment showing my respectful agreement/disagreement, I will but, if the climate is already nasty, I step back. It's not worth it. Like I replied to the last comment, it can be a fine line.Delete
I totally and completely agree!ReplyDelete
Thank you Betsy! I love it when I see something that inspires a blog post that practically rolls out by itself like this. It's even better when so many people are inspired to chime in :)Delete
I fully agree! I am an "anonymous", but at the same time, my rants are about my personal life.. I don't use my anonymity to be ugly - I use it to connect with people that I don't have the courage to connect with in real life... some of these trolls are standing at the ready and are searching for something to be a bitch about, make fun of, or just be mean about. I have no desire to do so... but at least I do have the power to block, unfollow, and move on from the meanness.ReplyDelete
Protecting your own and your family's anonymity is normal and healthy in this connected age. It's when people hide behind that to judge and be cruel to others that a line has been crossed. We do indeed have the power to block and what a superpower that is ;)ReplyDelete
Bounds need to be set in life, doesn't matter what your doing...I let my comment form runs pretty free, but I do set bounds...ReplyDelete
I always felt free to let people comment as they see fit. If you have any desire to leave a comment that is spam or to exploit others.
If you have the need to express your self here and can only use swear words please keep in down to bare minimal.
please leave my blog and no need to come back.
If some reason you can not follow these simple request I will remove your post.
All others are welcome
For me when it comes to blogging Etiquette and someone ask a question how do one replies,
Coffee is on
Yep, go ahead and express your opinion, just be respectful while you do itDelete
I loved that post of hers-- she always has a ton to teach, I learn something every time.ReplyDelete
And yep-- people get downright nasty on the interwebs. It's an odd phenomenon we seem to have created by giving everyone the option to create any sort of "username" they can hide behind.
The internet can be a great place for those who are shy to connect with others while being in their comfort zone but some do take it as a license to be mean.Delete
Julie definitely has some great lessons to teach so I'm happy to have found her.
Definitely agree with you here. I am constantly shocked and appalled by some of the hateful and downright nasty comments people post anonymously. Unfortunately, the ability to hide your identity on the internet brings out the very worst side of human nature sometimes.ReplyDelete
Sad but true……Delete
Thankfully, there are so many great people out there to make up for the trolls. Thanks for stopping by :)