Here's the prompt that I chose from Mama Kat this week - choose a theme word to live by in 2014 and tell us why you chose it
I have been spending some time thinking about what I want for 2014. What would I like to change? What kind of goal should I set for myself? I had many half-formed thoughts but was having a hard time nailing down what felt right. I even took to Google to look for inspirational quotes to see if anything would “speak” to me. Amazingly enough, one did speak to me and it wasn’t so much something to lift me to new heights but to be more accepting of myself in my own imperfection:
“Remind yourself that it’s okay not to be perfect”
How darned simple is that?! Actually, when you think about it, it’s really not that simple at all. How many of us spend time beating ourselves up for perceived faults? You let your kids have too much junk on a day when you came home exhausted, you stumbled on your words during a presentation, your jeans are tighter than you want them to be after the holiday eat-fest that is Christmas……. I won’t claim to know where men sit in this but we women are so damned hard on ourselves. We expect ourselves to live up to expectations that aren’t realistic and then criticize ourselves when we don’t reach those goals.
This year, I want to embrace my imperfection; inside and out!
I am always the one behind the camera. I have plenty of pictures of my kids but not many of me with them or, when there is one with me in it, I criticize how I look in it and often will hit “delete”. So what if there are circles under my eyes or my cheeks are redder (and rounder) than I would like! My kids see my face every day looking as it does and love me anyway. It would be sad if they looked through the pictures after I’m gone and don’t have very many to remember me by just because I didn’t feel that I looked perfect.
|Let's start with this one (even after many glasses of wine)|
Would I like to lose weight? Of course. Do I have the impulse control to go on an all-out self-depriving diet to accomplish this? Realistically…..no. I’ve always felt that it is all or nothing as far as food goes and, when I do try to diet, beat myself up when I cave in and eat something I shouldn’t. This takes me completely off the rails. The thing that I am slowly coming to realize is that no diet has to be perfect in order to be healthy. Slipping into the realm of junk here and there is not the end of the world as long as you are also making a lot of healthy choices. So I am going to try to make good choices most of the time and not worry about those times that the chips call my name.
I am not a perfect parent and have often put myself through guilt-trips when I felt that I have not lived up to expectations. There are days when their meals aren't as balanced as they should be. There are days when my nerves are frayed and I've snapped at them. Do these things make me a bad mom? No, they make me a human one and humans are not perfect. My kids are smart, happy, well-mannered and well-adjusted all without a perfect mom. That's something to be proud of.
So, this year, I will stand tall and be happy with my imperfect self. This, my friends, is probably the best stress buster there is.
Great post! I was just thinking of something similiar to this earlier. Accepting ourselves as we are is a great new year's resolution for any momma. Happy New Year.ReplyDelete
Thank you Angela! It's advice we all need to take these days.Delete
Happy New Year to you and your family too :)
Great post - I always run away when people want to take my picture or I delete the picture if I don't like how I look in it. This year I want to make sure I get pics of myself with my family.ReplyDelete
I wouldn't have really thought about it twenty years ago but, these days, I'm thinking more about what I want to leave behind. I think that a rich photographic record for our kids and (eventual) grandkids is important. Let's try to remind each other once in a while this year ;)Delete
Beautifully written and so true. We are hard on ourselves and perhaps lightening the pressure will be the key. Great idea and super cute picture. Happy New Year my new friend! !ReplyDelete
Happy New Year to you too Barb! We definitely need to give ourselves permission to not be all/do all/have all and be happy with who we are.Delete
Kathy, love starts from within, and you have had plenty for everyone else, now it's time for you to know how wonderful it is to be loved by you.ReplyDelete
And as my mom used to tell me: "No one is perfect except for my sister and Jesus Christ". So there! Glad to hear you are going to stop being so hard on yourself. I learned trick that a while ago...it's a habit that I am trying to get into!
Cheers to you my friend and super supporter of positive change!!
Lol, I can hear your mom saying that! Thank you so much for your kind words of support. Your love and friendship mean more than you know my lovely SIL xoDelete
Ah, perfection. It's a race that nobody wins.ReplyDelete
Yet so many stress themselves out trying…...Delete
That's a great perspective for the new year. We often waste so much effort trying to be perfect in every way, even as we know it will never happen. Better to embrace our imperfection and just be the best we can.ReplyDelete
I certainly want to continue in my quest for self-improvement but it's definitely tiime to stop stressing myself out by chastising myself for every imperfect moment.Delete
I love it! And the truth is I don't think ANYONE thinks they've really got it together. We all struggle in one way or another and all of us think the next person has got it all figured out. We need to embrace that we are who we are and just love ourselves! Thanks for the reminder!ReplyDelete
That's so true! Those who we look at and admire for their "perfection" so often have their own feelings of inadequacy. Instead of looking at the greener grass of others, we need to be happy with our own little patch of green.ReplyDelete
Your post is exactly why I decided to let go of "resolutions" this year! In the past, I always set myself up for failure with unrealistic expectations and then wondered why I always felt so down on myself or couldn't find the motivation to continue. This also has to do with listing superficial goals too. What a fantastic word!ReplyDelete
Unatainable New Year's expectations have always let me down so I tried to maek this year's goal a little more reasonable. Accepting my own imperfection seems attainable to me :)Delete