Saturday, November 21, 2009

Accentuate the Positive!

There is something that I've been noticing lately. We all seem to almost revel in pointing out the negative things about other people. At work, we talk about other coworkers' weaknesses; mistakes, absenteeism, attitude, etc. With family and friends, don't we all engage in gossip? You know, how person A slighted person B; this person is jealous of that one; lack of housekeeping skills; those horrible cookies she made last week; oh, and don't get me started on HER haircut! As parents, we have the horrible habit of comparing others' parenting skills to our own (unfavourably, of course!).

Why do we do this? Do we really feel better when we put other people down? I believe the idea is to build ourselves up by pointing out the weaknesses of others. Why then, do I always feel a bit crappy after engaging in this behaviour? When you build yourself up by tearing others down, that tower that you put yourself on is really pretty darned rickety. After all, look at the foundation that you've built it on. Maybe that crappiness that I feel is seasickness from the swaying of my tower. Mmmmm....

This behaviour is so common that we have a hard time taking a compliment. When someone says something nice about me or my kids, I blush and get totally speechless; fumbling through (hopefully) graceful thank yous. Why are we so shy about complimenting each other? How hard is it to tell someone that they are doing a good job, have great style, are a good mom...

This evening I said something nice (and true!) to one of my Twitter friends who was feeling the blahs. She responded with a "thanks" and let me know that she hadn't been fishing for compliments. Since when is turning to friends when you are feeling down fishing for a compliment? When you are down, your friends (even just Twitter friends) are supposed to be there for you pointing out the things that lift you up. That's what we are there for.

Maybe if we make the effort to find something positive to say to someone, friend or stranger, each day our own personal towers will have stronger foundations. Now, that would be something to feel good about.


Sunday, November 15, 2009

What a week!

Wow, has it really been three weeks since I last did a blog entry?! I've been so busy lately that my online presence has been spotty at best. I've been spending some down-time this weekend letting my Facebook and Twitter friends know that I really am still alive. I am totally behind on my blog reading too although I just had a really good laugh at @WhyIsDaddyCryin's blog about pink duck's day out ( That man is just too funny and boy did I ever need that laugh after this week!

My little Drama Girl was down with a nasty little bug last week and, of course, generously passed it on to me. It's amazing how, when they get sick, they look pitiful for a few days, then are bright-eyed and bushy tailed and ready to face the world again. They pass that same bug on to their poor parents and those poor adults are down for a week (or more). Anyway, after lying around all last weekend, I decided that I would drag my poor, sorry butt to work on Monday (talk about a work ethic) and went to check my bank balance online because I wanted to hit the drugstore on the way.

Imagine my surprise when, instead of being greeted by a healthy balance waiting for my rent cheque to pass, I found that $500 had been withdrawn from my account. This wouldn't be so bad if it had been ME who made that withdrawal! A phone call to my bank's security division revealed that they were already on it (they are definitely good) and I would get my money back in seven to ten days but, until then, I was on my own with a couple of cheques floating around out there just waiting to pass through my account. Eeek! Luckily, I have a pretty decent ex-husband who, when he heard of my dilemma, offered to loan me the money. Thanks to Stinky, both of those cheques passed through my account without a hitch. I owe him a BIG favour! (again, eek!)

My work-week wasn't much better. I just couldn't do anything right and spent most of the week trying to keep under my boss' radar; something that I mostly succeeded at, thank goodness! I don't think that I could have taken a lecture in my frame of mind. My stress levels had me kinda high strung and I even had an eye-twitch to prove it. I pretty much stuck to my corner, coughing and feeling pretty darned miserable. Of course, after a start like that, could I really have expected this week to be a good one? When 5:00 came on Friday, I couldn't get out that door fast enough.

I may not be able to redo last week but, hopefully, this coming one will get off to a better start. I think that I'll go bake some cookies; you know, nudge things in the right direction


p.s. the bug that my daughter passed on to me was just a good old fashioned cold so, please, don't lecture me about spreading the swine flu around....oink, oink (oops!)